The Best love
I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl.
Im young again! she shouts exuberantly.
As my friend raves on about her new love, Ive taken a good look at my old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds. once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His hairline is receding and his body shows the signs of long working hours and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home.
When my friend asked me What will make this love last? I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment, shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, communication. Yet theres more. We still have fun. Spontaneous good times.Yesterday, after slipping the rubber band off the rolled up newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being together.
And there are surprises. One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a pot of gold and the treasure of a gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little presents under his pillow.
There is understanding. I understand why he must play basketball with the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house, the kids － and even him － to meet my sisters for a few days of nonsTOP talking and laughing.
There is sharing. Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens － we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after Id read it.
There is forgiveness. When Im embarrasssingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market, I gave him a hug and said, Its okay. Its only money.
There is sensitivity. Last week he walked through the door with that look that tells me its been a tough day. After he spent some time with the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year-old woman whod had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the womans husband standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I shed a few tears myself. Because of the medical crisis. Because there were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying patients.
There is faith. Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the frightening effects of Alzheimers disease on her father-in-laws personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, this is too much heartache for one week. Through my tears, as I went out to run some errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a neighbors house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and that the joys counter the sorrows. It was enough to keep us going.
Finally, there is knowing. I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night; hell be late to most appointments and eat the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head; Ill lock us out of the house at a regular basis, and I will also eat the last chocolate.
I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not bluer: its just a familiar hue. We dont feel particularly young: weve experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom, taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories.
I hope weve got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had Scotts wedding band engraved with Robert Brownings line Grow old along with me! Were following those instructions.
If anything is real, the heart will make it plain.
【中文譯文】：
我的一位朋友正在熱戀。她坦稱天空比以前更藍了，莫扎特的音樂讓她落淚。她體重降了十五磅，看起來就像一個封面女郎。
我又年輕啦！她激動地大喊。
當我的朋友幸福地大談特談她的新歡時，我對我的舊愛細細審視了一遍。和我共度了將近二十年的老公斯科特體重增了十五磅。以前的馬拉松運動員，現在只能在醫院的大廳里跑來跑去的。他前額的頭發愈加少，從體型能看出他長期工作并且糖塊吃得太多。但他仍能隔著飯店的桌子，好的英語學習網站，用眼神向我發出某種暗示，然后我會立即結賬，一塊回家。
當朋友問我是什么讓大家的愛情持續時，我的腦海里立刻浮現出所有那些顯而易見的答案：承諾、一同喜好、無私奉獻、身體吸引、交流交流，還有不少。大家仍然擁有樂趣，那些隨便而來的美好時光。昨天，解開捆報紙的橡皮筋后，斯科特開玩笑地彈了我一下，隨即引發了一場全方位的戰爭。上周六在雜貨店，大家分開購物，比賽哪個先買好東西到結賬處。甚至刷碗也能大鬧一下。大家只不過享受簡單的共處。
另外還有驚喜。一天我回到家，看到前門上貼著一張便條，它把我引向另一張便條，然后是另一張，一直把我引到家可進入的壁櫥。我打開壁櫥門，發現斯科特站在里面，一手拿著金壺（我的蒸煮鍋），免費學英語的網站，一手拿著一包包裝精美的寶物。我有時也在鏡子上給他留便條，或把小禮品放在他的枕頭下。
還有理解。我理解他為何必須要和伙伴們打籃球。他也理解我為何每年都要找個機會離開家和孩子們（甚至他）幾天，同我的姐妹們沒完沒了地聊啊笑啊。
還有推薦。大家不但推薦家務瑣事和為人爸爸媽媽的責任，還有思想交流。斯科特上月去開會，回來后他送給我一本厚厚的歷史小說。雖然他更喜歡恐怖及科幻小說，他還是在飛機上將這本小說讀完。當他講解說是由于想在我讀完后能與我交換技巧時，我深受感動。
還有寬恕。當我在聚會上叫人尷尬地喊叫瘋狂時，他原諒了我。當他承認在股市賠進來大家的一些積蓄時，我擁抱著他說：沒關系，不過是些錢罷了。
還有敏銳。上個星期當他回來的時候，臉上的神情讓我感覺他這天過得非常不好。他與孩子們玩了一會兒，之后我問他出了什么事。他給我講述了一個六十歲老太太的事情。這個老太太得了中風。回憶起老太太的老公站在她床邊、愛撫著她的手的情形，他不由自主地流下了眼淚。他怎忍心告訴這個與她相伴四十年的老公他的老婆可能從來不會康復啊！我也不禁落淚。由于那位老太太不治的病情，由于仍有四十年的夫妻，由于經過數年的病房工作，整天面對垂死的患者，我的老公仍會感動，仍存憐憫。
還有信仰。上周二，一個朋友到家來，向我傾訴她的老公正在流失和癌癥斗爭的勇氣。周三，我和一個朋友一塊午餐她正煩惱著在離婚之后怎么樣重新梳理我們的生活。周四，一個鄰居告訴我老年癡呆癥在她岳父身上有著多么可怕的影響。周五，一個兒時的朋友打長途電話告訴我她的爸爸過世了。在我掛了電話之后，想：這個星期真是一個傷心的星期。哭過之后，我有事要出去一下。我注意到鮮艷奪目的橙色劍蘭正在我的窗外開放著。我聽到我的孩子和他們的朋友一塊玩耍的嬉戲聲。我看到鄰居家正好在舉行著結婚典禮。新娘穿著綢緞和蕾絲的禮服，將花束拋向她歡呼的朋友。那晚，我告訴我的老公發生的這類事情。
最后，還有相互知道。我了解斯科特會把衣服扔得到處都是，然后晚上又面對滿地的東西臉紅；約會時他一直遲到，還會把盒子里最后一塊巧克力吃掉。他也了解我一直喜歡在頭上放著枕頭睡覺；把大家鎖在屋外是我的家常便飯，還有我也會把盒子里最后一塊巧克力吃掉。
我感覺大家的愛之所以能延續是由于它非常溫馨。當然，我的天空并沒變得更藍：它還是我熟知的色彩。大家也不特別地感到年輕：大家歷程得太多了。這讓大家成熟，帶來智慧，也在大家的身體上刻下印記，免費學英語的網站，讓大家切身感覺到痛苦，也創造了大家一同的回憶。
但愿大家都了解是什么讓大家的愛維持下來的。在我還是新娘的時候，斯科特給我的結婚戒指上面刻著羅伯特?勃朗寧的名言：讓大家一塊變老吧！大家一直遵循著這類指導。
假如什么事情都是真的，心里都會了解的。